


Five Times The PRT Learned About Anderson’s Food Issues

by unquietspirit



Series: PBJ Amnesty [3]
Category: Fake News RPF, Real News RPF
Genre: 5 Things, Food Issues, Pundit Round Table, WIP Amnesty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-25
Updated: 2014-05-25
Packaged: 2018-01-26 11:37:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1686917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unquietspirit/pseuds/unquietspirit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Posted as part of WIP Amnesty 2014, and as such, will never be finished. The only section that's really finished is the first one, and some of the others are just my notes.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Five Times The PRT Learned About Anderson’s Food Issues

**Author's Note:**

> Posted as part of WIP Amnesty 2014, and as such, will never be finished. The only section that's really finished is the first one, and some of the others are just my notes.

1\. When they ate with him.

 

“What is _that_?” Anderson demanded as the waiter set a bowl of green goop between him and Stephen.

“It’s spinach-avacado dip. Want to try some?” Stephen asked.

From the face Anderson pulled, he might’ve just been offered a bite of rancid meat. “No! You’re seriously going to eat that? It looks disgusting!”

“It’s good! You should try it.”

“I’m fine, thanks,” he replied, watching dubiously as Stephen dipped a piece of his flatbread into it and ate.

“Didn’t your mother ever tell you to eat your veggies, Anderson?” Rachel asked.

“She’s not really that kind of a mother. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever tasted spinach or avocado. Or most other green vegetables.”

There was a slightly shocked silence, and then Stephen sighed and took on a parental tone. “So how do you know you don’t like it if you’ve never tasted it?”

“I’ve never tasted cockroaches, either, but I’m pretty sure-“

“Oh, please,” Keith interrupted. He might’ve said more, but Jon reached across Stephen for a wedge of the flatbread, scooped up some of the dip with it, and flew it toward Anderson’s mouth, making _voom-voom_ noises.

“Open up the runway for the landing,” he sing-songed. Anderson reacted by turning his head away and burying his face in Keith’s shoulder.

Jon giggled. “You’re worse than my kids,” he said, diverting the ‘airplane’ to his own mouth.

“It’s safe now,” said Keith with a pat to the top of Anderson’s head. “The mean man took the spinach away.”

“Spinach-avacado,” Stephen corrected.

Anderson cautiously pulled away from Keith’s shoulder and winced. “I can still see it.”

 

2\. When they didn’t eat with him.

(Keith takes offense, Rachel accidentally kicks Jon trying to shut him up)

 

3\. When they saw the contents of his refrigerator.

(jug of water, package of hotdogs, empty Domino’s pizza box)

 

4\. When he asked existential food questions.

 

“What’s the point of the yolk, anyway?” he asked, poking his fork suspiciously at the sunny-side-up eggs Rachel was serving for brunch.

She rolled her eyes. “It’s so the baby birdie has something to eat as it develops.”

“Yeah, but what’s the point of _me_ eating it? Doesn’t it seem strange to you to eat the same thing as a chicken embryo? Plus, it’s all slimy.”

 

5\. When they watched his show.

 

“Andy, you know as comedians, sometimes we don’t know when to shut up. But if we’ve ever… I mean, I hope you feel you can…”

“What Stephen’s trying to say is, we’re very sorry if we were ever douches to you about your food quirks. We meant it in fun. If we’re douches in the future, just tell us to shut up.”

“Does that apply to all of you?” Anderson asked, with a slyly pointed glance at Keith.


End file.
